Easter 2010

This year Easter 2010 was filled with snow, spring break, LDS General Conference, Easter egg hunt, and yummy Easter Day food and fun. The kids, Kayla, 14, Nathan, 10, Britt, 7, Cami 4,a nd Emily 2, were excited for Easter. I think Kayla was even abit excited. The Easter Bunny hid their eggs the ones we decorated and their certain color, Kayla-purple, Nathan, Green, Brittany, blue, Cami, Pink, and Emily orange. The Easter Bunny left 5 clues for the kids to find thier Easter present, a trampoloine. The sad part was, is that it has been snowing for about 5 days straight!!! The kids are so sad that they can't put up the tramp and play on it. The rest of the day was filled with General Conference and playing with family. We made Easter cupcakes and we all enjoyed frosting and decorating the cupcakes, especially Emily who probably frosted and decorated over half of them and loved every minute of it! Saturday night everyone took a part of the Easter Day Meals and made it for us. Britt had Breakfast and made her favorite-Baked French Toast. Nathan made our 7 layer salad and Kayla made rolls. Cami helped make strawberry short cake desert and fruit salsa for snack on Sunday. It was a fun time in the kitchen and we enjoyed our Easter Sunday with all the yummy food and fun time together.

March Madness Continued

So more on our March Madness...

I have started a preschool, the Learning Express. I have always wanted to do this, and Cami and Emily are at the perfect age to participate and I don't have to pay for preschool. We started in February and I along the way we have added two kids. My original plan was to go Monday thru Thursday allowing for one day where only Pre-K kids would come. I did this for alittle while but I didn't get more kids and only had one pre-k'r so I just switched over to three days, Mon-Wed. This is really nice I feel like I can keep up alittle more on things that I need to do as a mom as well. We have been learning all kinds of fun things, even I have been enjoying them. I have loved the time to focus in on the kids. I love the feel of satisfaction when Emily comes and tells me her shapes or starts counting, or Cami starts telling me about the Artic or is so excited because she can write her letters. I have a feeling I will be doing this for awhile since both my girls have preschool coming up, so I look forward to this fun time with them.

Along with preschool, I have started reconstructive surgery. I felt it was time and I look forward to finishing completely my recovery from breast cancer. It has not been an easy process, I really didn't know what to expect but I guess any time you are trying to expand skin it probably will be a little painful. Mike has been great about it and tries to help where he can. I had an expander put in and the doctor will fill the expander a little at at time to expand the area until the desired size, I am thinking DD's-ha ha! My doctor is in Idaho Falls and I go down once a week. When the process is done the doctor will put in the implant and fix the other side to match. It is hard to know how long the process will take because we are moving very slowly since I have radiated skin, we are taking our time to make sure the skin has time to heal in between fillings. I do hope that I can wear a swim suit this year that looks symmetrical.

As you can see our March is really madness, but we are muddling through and having a great time anticipating spring and hopefully some warm sunshine soon.

Our Own March Madness

So it's not basketball but it's still madness:) We have been busy, with Mike's training, my preschool, the kids activities and starting my reconstructive surgery.

Mike is about ready for his Ironman in St George on May 1st. It is great to see him training so hard for something so big, he is amazing!! With only about 6 weeks away, we are gearing up for a great weekend. Mike has now swam for over an hour straight, biked 130mi. and ran 20mi. He will have one more big push before the big event and then he will start tapering his training about two weeks out. Amazing, he has really fought the elements and been determined in being prepared for this. Mike has been great about trying to plan his practicing around the time when the kids aren't home. He gets up at 5a to swim and then runs during lunch. He bike's his long rides on Friday's while the kids are at school. During the next big push we are going to get the kids a little bit more involved. I really want them to see dad pushing and working his way to his goal. Mike does these triathlons for himself, but also so the kids can see dad reaching and accomplishing his goals. I think I will wake them up at 5a some morning when Mike goes for a swim and then we will go ride our bikes with dad the last few miles of this big bike ride and go meet him on his next big run. Mike participates in these crazy races not just for himself but we are hoping it will inspire them someday to work for their dreams and achieve great things.

Along with Mike's training, the kids have had a great winter inside. They have been involved in a number of fun actvities. Emily is a monkey by nature, she is always climbing and wants to be cuddled. We get to participate in a mom & me class at our local gym and she LOVES it she is doing front rolls and handstands, flips on the couch and "table tops". She loves the tramp and yesturday in gym was trying to do a tornado turn on the tramp and the coach and I just started laughing. This turn is where you put your arms up in the air looking kinda like a rocket and then you are suppose to jump and turn all the way around at the same time. Emily actually did it- especially with her head!! When ever she tried to do it she would turn her head in circles hoping her body would follow, it was so cute and so hilarious but it worked and she did her little tornado jumps all the way down the tramp head turning and everything. Cami is also in this class and is loving all the jumping and climbing and swinging. She loves being active and loves the creativity. Brittany is in her element in gym. She loves the mix of dance and tumbling. It is fun to watch her progress and feel good about her efforts. Nathan has been in karate, he has always wanted to take karate lessons, but for some reason I had always been a little weary of it. He has loved every minute and is trying to figure out how to fit it in the schedule between soccer and swim team and pay for it himself by mowing lawns and snow removal. Nathan is still taking piano and has really gotten into playing some classical pieces, he started trumpet this year and loves the friends and music he is making in band. Kayla has been dancing her heart out in ballroom this year and has started swim team again. She has missed swim and is looking forward to getting back in the water. We finally found a piano teacher for Kayla who is just perfect for her, Kayla is really loving the music and her time on the piano, she sounds AMAZING!

As you can tell, we have tried to stay active this winter and stay warm inside having fun.

The heart of the shamrock

Today I did a first.

This month is muscular dystrophy month and Albertsons is selling shamrocks in "support" of the cause. I have NEVER bought any such thing before, to me is seemed like such a waste of money. I always thought why should I, the money just goes to peoples "corporate non-profit" wallets and hardly goes to the people. Today while I was at the store I was overcome with emotion as I read about 2 boys with a type of muscular dystrophy who were fighting the disease here our area. All of a sudden I wanted to buy every single one the shamrocks, it hit me like a ton a bricks, these shamrocks are not just for the money to help the disease, but to show them that people care and support them in their fight. I bought two and put my kids names on them that are their same age. I tried to tell Cami about her shamrock, I think she understood a little bit, and I plan on telling Nathan about his tonight at dinner. I hope that my kids will understand not only the importance of thinking about someone with a serious disease, but the action of showing support to someone who probably has fought and will fight for awhile.

What We Have Been Up To

It has been a little while since I last wrote. All my treatments are done and I have a nice head of hair back. My hair is still pretty short and straight!! but it is kinda cute. Brittany told me one sunday shortly after I decided to stop wearing my wig that she wouldn't go to church unless I put it on, she even went and got it for me. I love that girl, I am sure it is weird having a mom that looks like a boy. Brittany is my girl that would care. Kayla has been great about my short/no hair. She has tried many times to talk me into going "naked", which surprises me for a teenager. The only side effects that I feel like I am still dealing with is that I forget short term things or get confused really easy when I have to think quick. I have done some research into this it is called, chemo brain and in time it will get better. In the mean time I have learned to really try to watch were I put my keys, etc. I can go see a occupational therapist if I want to if it still bothers me in December. I also have a hard time sleeping at nights but we just have to get through that one. My treatment plan from here on out is to take daily a medicine called Tamoxifen. Tamoxifen keeps my body from producing estrogen. My tumor needed estrogen to grow so the theory is that no estrogen, no tumor and then after awhile if there is any cancer left it will die. There are no tests to test for reacourance, the tests they do have sometimes come back false positive which just causes stress. The doctor prefers to just have me come in every 3months for the first year and watch for any signs of reacourance. I figure that if there is a reacourance that is not a good thing no matter what test I take so I am fine with just watching for signs to catch it early so we can take steps to survive the disease, which would require me to be on chemo for the rest of my life to keep the cancer from growing. With all the procedures that I have gone through the doctor estimates that I am in the upper 90th percentile of being cured, so that is reassuring and I know personally that I have done all that I can so now I just move forward with faith. There have been a couple of days that I have worried about an reacourance but for the most part I have felt amazing. I am running, I am up to about 4 miles I am very please with my progress.

The thing that has been most difficult recently for me has been to trying to find a balance in life and to get organized. I am surprised at how hard it has been, I finally figured it out what might be contributing. It has been three years since we have moved here; the first year we were getting settled and worried about our house selling in AZ, the second year we had Emily, and the third year I have had cancer. So it really is no wonder that I feel a little behind. I have been thinking about how I should share my journey of finding balance in my life. It has been fun to see it develop over the past few months, but I do wish I could just figure it out. I decided to look at it as a journey not just trip with an end point. There will be uphills and down hills and easy roads. In the end hopefully I will have something good figured out. I know that some of you are probably saying "just stop doing too much" and "pick wiser priorities". Well that is probably the case, but it feels so good to be able to things again that I just want to do everything and I feel like everything is important. I have done a lot of thinking trying to figure out what my priorities are and what they really should be. I made a list of what I felt where the most important and I also figured that I have 5 hours (9a-2p)a day to do everything a mom/wife is suppose to do. In that 5 hours I have to do the "daily to-do's" like, cook, clean, put kids down for naps, and play with the kids. Amongst all the "daily to-do's" we have our "daily extra things", the things that you don't have to do everyday but still are my job like, paying bills, menu planning or grocery shop. I finally got to the point where I scheduled what I felt were my priorities. We all know that a mom's life can't be that scheduled but it gave me an idea of us of my time. I figured that if I got up at 5:30a that would allow me to exercise, read my scriptures and shower before breakfast at 7:30a. I also figured that if I put out breakfast and made lunches the night before that I would get in my "me" things in the morning. This would open up more time in my "crazy 5". We actually have started a pretty good assembly line with one child taking a portion of the lunch and making it and then each child just goes through the different lunch item piles and fills their lunch it seems to work pretty good. My plan has been working pretty good So far. I have felt better about getting all the priorities in each day and I feel like I am getting organized and being able to spend time with the kids and Mike plus take care of me. I don't remember life being this hard before cancer, maybe I am just realizing I want to use my time more efficiently and effectively than before not taking any day for granted.

Since the last blog we have done a lot of fun things, here is a short summary of events at the "Wacky Whitesides" and I will elaborate on them later.

Mike took first place overall at the Rexburg RUSH triathlon in the sprint division.

Nathan participated in the scouts pinewood derby and had a great time building his car with dad. They don't keep track of the winners here, but we think that he did very well and of course loved every minute of it.

We actually got to go camping. We thought this summer was one that we would have to pass by without a camp out, but we got to spend a fun filled couple of days in beautiful Island Park, ID.

August 26th first day of school. Kayla 9th grade, Nathan 5th grade, Brittany 1st grade, and Cami Preschool.

August 27th last day of Radiation and celebration party.

September 3rd-8th Mike and Jeni had a fun filled weekend in Boise.

Kayla tried out high school cross country this fall and loved it. She did so great!!

Jeni has been the canning queen with her friend Sunny.

Mike participated in a relay run that ran from the Idaho Falls LDS temple to the Rexburg LDS temple.

Nathan and Brittany participated in a kids tri that was amazing!

Emily turned 2, Brittany turned 7 and Mike turned 29 again.

We traveled to St. George, UT to let Mike travel the ironman course and the meet up with Grandpa and Grandma Mc Nett. On the way back home, the fun and nice Mc Nett clan in Salt Lake had lunch ready for us to eat and visit.

Coming up, we can't wait until Halloween. The little girls plan on being lady bugs, Kayla plans on being an 80's girl and Nathan is tentatively planning on being Eragon from the Eragon series. Kayla is planning a fun Halloween party and the other kids are excited to go trick-n-treating. I just hope the weather holds out.

Radiation

I am sorry I haven't had time to blog. We have been pretty busy here with radiation everyday and the kids home from school.

I am feeling great!! better than I expected. I am very pleased with my progress of recovery and my hair is even staring to grow back :). I have had good energy and have really been able to enjoy the summer and the kids being home. I was able to take a trip to Salt Lake last week to spend time with family. This was a trip that I planned while I was on Chemo and it felt so far away when I was planning it, but I knew that it would come and when it did then I would be done with Chemo!!! When the time came to go I was very excited to see family and to know that I had made it through chemo.:) We had a great time and I even felt good enough to enjoy myself.

The summer has been fun, a couple of fun things we have done so far are: go to Rupert for the 4th and the Whitesides family reunion, play in Salt Lake, and swimming lessons. We are looking forward to camping this weekend, Cami's birthday, school starting and to a Mike & Jeni trip (I think we deserve one, how about you?).

I began radiation on July 14th. I know have 10 sessions done, almost a third, of the 33. I will end on August 27th, the day the kids start back to school. I was pretty bummed for awhile about starting later than expected and thus finishing later, but at least we are on the road to being done with all of this. The only side effects for my kind of radiation are fatigue towards the end and that my radiated skin will turn pink or red, like a sunburn, but if this is all for the side effects-I will take it. I have to goto Idaho Falls -I.F.-(about 30 min. away), everyday (Monday-Friday). My appointment takes about 15 minutes including parking the car and backing out of the parking lot. My "zapping" takes only about 5 minutes at the most. I walk right in to the office change into a cape and then wait my turn in a little semi-private room. The radiologists walk me back to the machine and I lay on a metal table draped with a sheet. I position myself into this mold type thing to help me position my upper body right for the machine The doctors wrap my feet with the end of the sheet and wrap a rubber band around the balls of my feet (I know kinda weird- they say it helps with the line up of the machine). Then they match up these marks that I have on my body with the machine to make sure I am in correct position. The nurses wanted to give me these tatoo dots but I opted not, just because I really don't want any mementoes of this fabulous time, so they just used permanent marker and clear stickers to protect the marks from fading too fast . I put my arms up over my head and hold onto these bars positioned right above my head. This allows for a open field to zap my chest, under arms, and neck. The machine is pretty big and rotates around to where it needs to zap. I don't feel or see anything at all.

The doctors have been great about scheduling my sessions to match my crazy summer schedule

with the kids home and taking trips, etc. I decided to sign the kids up for swim lessons in I.F. on my way to session. It has been really easy and has allowed me to feel better about driving down to I.F. everyday, I also am not leaving the kids behind everyday. I was thinking that I would have friends drive me a couple times a week just to make the trip more fun and hopefully not so tiring, but I am glad we can swim- at least for now.

More next time...

Happy Port- Out Day

Happy Port-Out Day!!!

Today I got my port out. My port is a central line or internal IV that was inserted into my chest right below my collar bone on my left side. It protrudes just a little and looks pretty weird under the skin. This is where the nurses inject the chemo for my sessions. There were times after chemo that I couldn't even look at it because it would make me nausea.

Today was a big day I felt like I came full circle. The surgeon who took it out also was the one who told us that I had cancer. A rush of emotions came over me as I prepared for my doctors visit and then after when it was all done. We have come a very long ways in the past few months.

As we were coming home from the surgeon Mike took the road that leads to the oncologist's office, and when we came to the street that would take us either home or to the office Mike said "oh no not today, today we are going home." I love that guy, he is amazing! He is my strength and I am so happy that I have him as a part of my life. This has been a tough road for both of us, but he has been the one who has held us together as I laid in bed or not felt good. He has been a single dad, taking care of 5 kids and a sick wife at the same time. This is not only a big day for me but for him and for all of us.


Happy Port-Out Day!!!